I was chatting with a friend recently, someone knee-deep in our Transforming Midlife program, and he had a confession to make.
“To be honest, I hate the word midlife,” he admitted. “It just makes me feel… well, old.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. Midlife has become one of those words, hasn’t it? For some, it’s a badge of honour, but for others, it’s a quick jab to the gut, a reminder that we’re ‘supposedly’ halfway through.
“Alright,” I said, “What would you prefer? How about ‘life re-imagined’ or ‘fresh start phase’?”
He shook his head. “Too vague,” he replied. “It still has that hidden reminder of age.”
“Okay, what about ‘modern elder’? I’ve seen that used,” I said.
His eyebrows shot up in horror. “Modern elder? I might as well start looking for a walking stick!”
And that got us both laughing. So, what is it about “midlife” that rubs people the wrong way? And how did it come to carry so much baggage?
When did 'midlife' become a thing?
The term “midlife” was coined back in the 20th century. Before that, people didn’t dwell too much on this in-between phase. You grew up, you lived, you retired (if you made it that far), and that was that.
But then psychology stepped in, and by the 1960s and ‘70s, the idea of a midlife crisis gained momentum. There it was: this supposedly inevitable period of questioning, self-doubt, and wondering what you’d been doing with your life.
Now, here’s the thing. Research tells us that around 10-20% of people actually experience a genuine “midlife crisis”, where the wheels come off for a period of time.
The other 80-90%? They have their questions, doubts and insecurities about midlife, but tend to go about their days without any existential breakdowns. So, why did the crisis part stick?
Because it sold well. Media loved the idea of a restless middle-aged person buying a flashy sports car or suddenly booking an exotic trip. It made for great headlines, punchy stories, and a bit of drama. But for the average person, midlife is far more nuanced than that.
So, what's midlife really about?
- Let’s break down some myths.
- Midlife = crisis
This isn’t true for most people. Sure, midlife comes with its share of transitions and introspection, but that’s far from a full-blown crisis. - Midlife = settling down
This one’s tricky. Some people see midlife as a time to settle down, but for others, it’s actually a launchpad for exploring new passions, starting new careers, or tackling long-forgotten dreams. - Midlife = becoming irrelevant
On the contrary, midlifers often have the experience and wisdom to become even more valuable, both in their careers and communities. Studies show that many people hit their stride in their 40s and 50s. As one CEO put it, “You finally know enough to do the work that matters most.”
What do you call a midlifer who isn’t in crisis?
Back to my conversation with my friend. We started tossing around ideas for what we could call people in this phase of life if “midlife” was too much of a downer.
Here’s what we came up with—and why none of them quite worked.
- Life re-imaginers
This one sounds great but feels a bit too abstract. “Re-imaginers” sounds like we’re hosting a brainstorming session, not actually living life. - Prime timers
I liked this one—it’s positive and hints at people being in their prime. But, as my friend pointed out, it also sounds like a senior discount card. - Seasoned souls
This one felt a bit poetic but also a little too “grandparent-like.” My friend laughed and said, “What are we, a fine cheese?”
So, we ended up back at midlife, like it or not. Maybe we’re stuck with it for now, but that doesn’t mean we have to view it in a grim light.
Shifting the narrative around midlife
Here’s the reality: midlife is what you make of it. Sure, the term might sound daunting, but the experience doesn’t have to be. And that’s the core of what we focus on at Midlife Crossroads Academy.
In fact, there’s a term I like: “growth mindset.”
Growth mindset says that every stage in life offers chances for growth, even when things get tough. You’re not stuck in one place just because you’re in your 40s or 50s. You’re in a stage of rediscovery, of expanding horizons.
Why midlife is actually fantastic
Here are some benefits to being in this “midlife” stage that I bet you hadn’t considered:
- More life experience
You’ve already learned so much. Now you get to put that wisdom into action in ways that make sense for you. - Financial freedom
Many people reach financial stability in their 40s and 50s, which means you’re freer to take risks, travel, or even start a new career. - Better self-knowledge
At this point, you know yourself better than ever. You’re more confident in your likes and dislikes, and that means you can set boundaries and focus on what truly matters to you.
Final thoughts: embrace midlife, or whatever you call it
Midlife, prime years, seasoned living—whatever you want to call it, this stage is far from the end of the road. It’s a time to look at what’s working, what’s not, and what’s next.
If you’re finding yourself caught in the middle, just remember: you’re not alone. Whether you’re 45, 55 or 65, it’s not too late to embrace your dreams, to be curious, to grow.
So, maybe midlife could use a rebranding, but let’s not get too hung up on the terminology. Instead, focus on what it represents: a chapter
full of potential, purpose, and yes—a little bit of mystery. It’s a stage we get to shape in ways that our younger selves could only dream about.
Ready to see what’s next? Join one of our programs and find out! Visit midlifecrossroadsacademy.com for all the details.
